Jokes in hindi non veg 140 words

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Jokes in hindi non veg 140 words



1 Ko girlfriend Naraz Thi,
2 Ko shadi ke liye tayar Thi,
3 Ko Yaaro Baarat Thi,
4 Ko Mast Suhagraat Thi
5 Ko Pyar Ki Barsaat Thi.
Aankh khuli to pata chala sapno ki kali raat Thi.

B S N L Customer Care
Bittu : Internet bohat slow chal raha hai
Customer Care Girl: Wow! Internet toh chal raha hai na kush raho

Madam: Sabse Zayada Izzat Kiske Paas Hai...?
Boys: Shakti Kapoor,Prem Chopra, Gulshan Grover, Amrish Puri, Pran Ke Paas.

Madam : Wo Kaise...?
Boys : Mamam kyuki inhone ne hi sabse zayada izzat Luti Hai....!

1 Akalmand Insaan Ne 1 Bewkuf Se Puchha...
Saab Tumhe Bewkuf Kyon Kehti H?
.
.
.
.
.
Niche Kya Dekh Rahe Ho Jawab Do.

Jo girls ye status dalti hai
.
.
.
Watching jurassic world
feeling excited.........on Whatsapp/Facbook
.
.
.
Ye wahi girls h jo ghar me
coackroch dikhte hi,
bed pe chalang laga deti hai

Titu ne Radio Mirchi call ki : Hello Radio Mirchi ?
RJ : Yes
Titu : Meri awaaz pura town sun raha hai ?
RJ : Ji Haan.
Titu : Yani ghar mein jo meri behan radio sunn rahi hai wo bhi sun rahi hogi.?
RJ annoyed: yes bro yes..
Titu : Hello Tinaaa..!
Agar meri aawaz sun rahi hai toh jaldi se motor chala de...!
Main toilet mein hun aur paani khatam ho gaya hai...

India me 1 ghar me jada se jada ladkiya peda hone ki khoyis 1 hi shakhs karta hai - dulhe ka bhai........short hindi jokes

Mere mobile ki bhi setting hai aur meri setting nahi ho rahi hai sayad mobile hi kuch krisma kar de..

Munaa bhai - A circuit yaar mere ko woh Hospital ki sister(nurse) se love ho gayala hai.
Love letter kaise likhu
Circuit - simple bhai aap like dalo I love you sister I am your munna bhai....!

Durion ki na párvah kijiye,
Dil jab b pukare bula lijiye,
Hum dur nahi zayada apse
Bás 1 bottle Mazaa aur
4 Sámose tááza Mángwa lijiye

Titu apni saliyo ke liye chudiya lekar aya
Saliya: jiju ap aphi pahna do haath me chudiya
Titu :agar pehale pata hota to chudiya ke jagah sunder chaddi le ke ata.

8th class ka student apne friend se: kitna muskil h school ki "Madam" se love karna, 2Friend: kyun? "love-letter" beja tha... Home work samgh ke check kar dia

1 cute girl ki T-shirt ke right side par 'C' likha tha
aur left side par 'L' likha tha...!
Titu ko kuchh samajh me nhi aaya.
usse jab rha nhi gya to
usne puchha: iska matlab kya hai...!
Girl : dhyan se dekh duffer "cool" dikhega...!

Girl to rikshawala- bhaiya andar tak jayega kya
rikshawala-ha ha kyu nhi aap hi ke liye to khada kiya h.
girl - ok to piche se ghuma ke le lo

Bhikari- kuch Khane ko de do
Girl - TAMATAR KHAO
Bhikari- roti de do
Girl - TAMATAR KHAO
Bhikari- achcha Lao tamatar hi de do
Girl's mother- Are Tum jao baba ...
Ye totli hai...keh rahi hai..KAMA KAR KHAO..

1 boy apni class me baitha tha.. 1 pretty girl speech start karne jaa rahi thi ki usse pehle boy ne apne dono hatho se apne kaan band kar diye... Friend : Tune apne haato se kaan kyu band kiye..? . . Boy: Are jo speech hai na.. wo meri GF h.... wo speech ke starting me hi bolegi... "My dear bother n sisters"

A very good and sweet nature girl -
Na Kabhi Tang Karti Hai,
Na Kabhi Cheekhti Chillaati Hai,
Na Kabhi Kisi Ke Saath Flirt Karti Hai,
Na Kabhi Jhooth Bolti Hai,
Na Kabhi Dhoka Deti Hai,
Na jada Boyfriend banati Hai,
Na jada Gossip kart Hai,
Na jada shopping karti Hai,
Aur Na Hi Is Duniya Mein Paayi Jaati

Pahle sms matlab kya hota tha, S-saral M-madhyam S-sandesh Ab jamana badal gya hai ab eska sahi mayne dekhiye, S-sidha M-modi S-sarkar Moral-nam vahi soch nai.

Mind-boggling, Overwhelming Intelligence
Patni ko shak huwa uske husband ka love affair hai kisi ke saath
Patni ne pati ke liye same colour ke 11 undearwear khride.
Pati-ek hi rang ke kyo?saab bolege me kabhi undearwear nahi
change karta kaya?
Patni ne ghoor ke dekha aur kaha
Patni-sab koon? sab koon?
Patni-chalo ghar paar batati tumko...hindi jokes

Jese detergent ke ads me chote beche kapre gande kar ke
ghar aa jate hai
bechpan me hum aa jaya karte the to kapre baad me dulte the
pehele mummy ke maar se hum dhul jaya karte the

Nikhattu ko beedi ki lat lag gayee
uske papa ne lat chhudane ke liye use
baba raamdevki Yoga class me bheja
aur phir
Papu aab paon se bhi beedi pee leta hai

kuch ladies Woman Gym me obesity/overweight solution
par baate kar lahe the..
1 lady me obesity kaam karne ke liye roj 4 K.M subaah me se chali hu
2nd lady mai swimming course kaar rahe hu
3 lady mai cycling karti hu morning-evening me

tabhi 1 slim trim pretty lady "Woman Gym" ke samne se guzar rahi thi
sare ladied me usko aawaz diya
Q-Dear lady what is secret of your beauty N Fitness?
A-Woo bechari boli dear I have very tuff duty
me appne saas ke sath rahti hu na..waha bahut sare kaam hote hai na......life stayle hindi jokes

Ye Whatsapp bhi bilkul chote beche ke
langot ki tarah hota hai
hota kuch bhi nahi, magar bar bar check
karna parta hai

Ladka ladki dating karke park se nikal rahe the Tabhi unhone dekha- sunsan sadak par Shaking car Ladke- ye kaya hai ? Ladki ne kaha- mohabbat jabardast

Ladka: shadi ke liye kaon se date rahe?
Ladki:Hichkichate hue-22 December
Laka:?
Ladki sharmate hue- suna hai saal ki sabse lambi raat hote hai

koi chiz buri nahi hoti bus Time Times ki baat hai
agar bajuwali scooty par koi khubsurat mast figure wali ladki ho
to traffic jam bhi achaa lagta hai....ladka ladki jokes

India main Gyan dene wali
Top 6 University.
Paan ki Dukan
Saloon
Facebook
Train ka dibba
WhatsApp
Twitter

Ek bahut garib ladke ko 1 chirag mila
Usne uthaya aur rgad diya
Jordaar dhmaaka huwa
khud mar gaya
Aladin ka jamana gaya
Laavaris chizo se door raho
kuch chize aladin ki nahi
muzzahidin ki bhi ho sakti hai
15 August 2015 is Near
Take caution Dear

1985 Party Song
Kids-Bholi bhali ladki khol tere dil ki
khol tere dil Ki pyaar wali khidki..
Papa-maar khna hai? Band karo ye saab..
2015 Party Song
Kids-party yu hi chlagi auty police bula legi
Father-Beche hai mante nahi.....party jokes in hindi

Modern Baba
Dekho bhkto
Mai ladkiyo ki kisi bhi baat ka bura nahi mante
Chahe wo"I love you" kyo na bol de...

5 dost hotel me lunch karne ke baad aapas me Bill dene ke liye
Discuss karne lage-Sabhi bolne lage yaar bill mai dunga....
nahi bill mai dunga..
Hotel Manager bahut khush huwa aur dil he dil me bola
Waahh.....Waahh.....Aaj bhi ase dilphek dost hai...
Akhir me decide huwa jo hotel ka chkkar phele lagayega wahi bill dega
Hotel Manager ne siti bjaye aur wo 5 dost bhage
Manager aaj bhi unke aane ka entzaar kaar raha hai
Ye hai "No.1-Yaari" "Hai sab pe bhari" | hindi jokes on friendship

Jitna pyaar meri girlfriend nahi jataa pati hai
utna to ye truck wale
"Phir Milege" likhkar jataa diya karte hai

Boy-o lal dupatte wali tera naam to bata
Girl-Aadhe Maa
Boy:(

Duniya me do log ek dusre ko bari Hasrat se Dekhte hai
kuware shadishuda ko aur shadisuda kuware ko

Aapne dil churaaya hum chup rahe,
Aapne neend churaai hum chup rahe,
Aapne hasi churaai hum chup rahe,
Aapne Chain churaai hum chup rahe
Ye to hadd ho gaye, Chappal to rehne dete.

Romantic Breaking News- Bathroom mein, ek ladka ne,
ek ladki ke silky badan ko, har jagah se Touch kiya,
pata hai wo boy kon tha- lifeboy.

Santa ne appne electronic shop ke bahar Slogan lgwaya
1 Rupye ka Chirkut bulb Lgaao 100% Bijli bill Bachao
Agle hi din uske dukan se 50,000 Chirkut bulb sell ho gaye
Dusre din bahut sare customer uske dukan ke bahar ho halla macha rahe the
Are ye Chirkut bulb Nahi Fuse bulb hai jalta hi nahi
Santa ne kaha sayad apne tik se padha nahi- Chirkut bulb Lgaao na ki Chirkut bulb jalao Santa-Bhai Sahab bulb jalega to bill aayega...
Janta shocked Santa rocked







Pappu : Sir Humara Poty Aaya Hai.
Math Teacher : To Main Kya Karu?
Toilet Chala Jaa.
Pappu : Up Galat Samajhra Sir,
Humara Answer Poty (40) Aaya Hai.

Santa fouj me bharti hua
2 din bad jung suru ho gai
santa ki topi per goli lagi
santa ne hathiyar phenk kar bola
aqalmand ke liye ishara kafi he.

Marketing Company ka call -
"Hii I'm Mohit from Kolkata"
Me- to main kya karu ?
"Hi I'm Aakas from Pune"
Me- to main kya karu ?
"Hii I'm Riya from Delhi"
Me- Hiiiiiiiiiii Riya.

Apple iPhone 6 launched in India at Rs. 53,500.00
mene papa ko kaha papa mughe iPhone 6 chiye.
Papa ne kaha- beta etne me to 1 bike+5 months ka petrol aa jayega
Mene moka pe choka mara - accha papa to wahe khrid do
Papa Shocked but me Rock........

Android’s versions are named as-

Cupcake,
Donut,
Éclair,
Froyo (frozen yogurt),
Gingerbread,
Honeycomb,
Ice Cream Sandwich,
Jelly Bean,
KitKat
Lollipop
Next: ?? GulabJamun»rasgulla»rasbhari










Kitne Tohfe Deti Hai. Ye Mohabbat
.
Bewafai Alag
Judai Alag
Tanhai Alag
Or
Mummy Se Pitai Alag.
'(',')'
</\>
Mummy Aram Se Maro
.
.
Aashiq Hon Rajnikant Nai...!

Ab har msgs hamari diffrent hogi,
dil ki aawaz dil tak send hogi,
muddat ho gya kisi hasi ka didar kiye,
aur log sochte hai jane hamari kitni girlfrnds hogi

A father was teaching
the spelling of word “ASSASSINATION”
to his child.
.
He says:
ek Gadha(ASS),
uspar ek aur Gadha(ASS)
jispar Mein(I),
aur mujh par sara Desh(Nation)

Hindi Jokes
How to reduce weight…??
.
First turn your head to the right and then to the left.
.
..
...
....
.....
Repeat this one whenever you have given something to eat!

Ek aadmi apne aap me kehta hue ja raha tha ki aisi zindagi se toh maut aachi.
Achanak Yamraj aa gaya aur bola “Tumhari jaan lene ka hukm hai”
Aadmi : Lo batao, aab insaan jokes bhi nahi kar sakta hai kya?

** Attention ** ** Attention **
please..."Lifebuoy"Se Mat Nahaya karo,
.
.
Suna hai Ye "keedo" ko Maarta Hai..
.
.
OR hum "Apko"KHONA Nahi Chahte.













Santa dialled a phone number.
A computerizd female voice said,
"apke paas paryapt balance nahi hai - Kipaya appna mobile rechage kare".
Santa: bas janeman tumse baat ho jati hai, itna hi kaafi hai!

Hum to nikle the apni tanhai se ladkar Mohabbat ki talash me... Baap re garmi bahut the gnnaa ka ras pikar aa gaye......hindi jokes

Meri lovely GF ke Shadi ka card mila bahut bura laga yaar,
baad me soocha, shadi me jauga jarur
kyko love apne jagah hai aur
Lazedar puri-sabji, pulao apni jahah



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